Thursday, May 16, 2013

Mother's Day 2013

Well, they can't all be good ones.  It wouldn't be real life if every Mother's Day just magically transformed into the best day ever.  Wes joked and said next year he was going to get me what I really wanted, a day without the kids.  Even that wouldn't classify as a great day because I'd spend the day wishing they were there with me.  

Some days I just don't fly at full speed.  My flag only flies at half mast and I'm irritable.  Yes, I said it, I can be irritable.  And if you meet a parent who says she never has a day like that, run the other way because lightning might be about to strike.

Bring a mom is a tough job.  It's also a very fulfilling, joyous, gratifying, and rewarding job.  However, as a mom of 2 young kids, the tough days tend to outweigh the super days.  As much as I try to focus on the positive the truth is, we're in a serious learning and transition time.  I'm learning to be the best mom I can be, all while realizing I'm not perfect and 50 other not-so-fantastic traits about myself.  Meanwhile, my children are learning what buttons to push, how to cope with their emotions, how to share, and all the other life skills that we somehow take for granted and think came preprogrammed into their little minds.  

Being a mom doesn't always mean being in control.  That's a hard one for me.  Just because you know they need a nap and desperately want them to take a nap (or go to bed at 5pm), doesn't mean it's going to happen.  No amount of force - I've tried - is going to physically make their little eyelids close.  No amount of bribery, coercing, or reasoning is going to make a strong-willed, opinionated, 5-year old take a nap when he doesn't want to.  Part of me wants to praise him for standing his ground because that will serve him well later in life when peer pressure rears its ugly head, but the other part of me, the part that is in the here and now wants to throttle him.  Nap = Sanity.  That equation doesn't balance when one of the components is negative.  Sometimes though, you have to wave the white flag and move on to Plan B.  Start praying for the sun to go down early so you can sneak in an early bedtime without them noticing.  

No matter what kind of day it's been, the fact that I came to play is all that matters.  Sure I may have days when I yell too much, don't feed them enough vegetables (gasp!), let them watch too much tv, but at least I tried.  Some days I may try less than others, but I was there.  It's unrealistic to think that you can give 100% of yourself every day to every person in your life.  I lived in that make believe world for a long time.  It's painful at the end of the day to realize you fell short...again...and again.  At some point you have to be content with giving it your best and realizing you can learn from your mistakes and short comings and hopefully give it another try tomorrow.  That's one thing we have, hope for tomorrow.  By the time we get this whole parenting thing all figured out, they'll be grown and on their own.  Then we can either write a book or guide our children with their children.  Now I feel old.  

I take my hat off to all the mother's.  By coming to play each day, you are putting your best foot forward.  They won't all be noteworthy days that the little lady at the coffee shop was talking about when she said to, "Enjoy every minute.  They're only young once."  No, you won't enjoy every minute.  Yes, you will wish away certain phases of their life.  But, yes you will be a great mom who is remembered and revered by her children for her love, not her mistakes.  Happy Mother's Day!



  1. I agree with EVERYTHING you wrote! I didn't behave very nicely on Mother's Day, either. Only I was mean to Shawn. (And since I'm not his mother, that makes it okay, right?) Luckily, he knows what I need sometimes more than I do, and he sent me out of the house for a couple of hours. It's funny how a random trip to Lowe's with a detour to Starbucks can make your day seem better. :)

  2. You're definitely an inspiring mother - and I'm sure your children will greatly appreciate that when they're ready to raise children of their own!

  3. Well said! I can admit that once mine both started school full-time, the good days started outweighing the bad by quite a bit. Getting to that point where you no longer have to change diapers, bathe, dress, hear "mom" 100+ times per day, and clean up after (as much, at least), is much nicer. Hold on -- you'll get there soon!!